Friday, November 7, 2008
That's It. I'm Done....
Okay so today was supposed to be one where I got up, did my Friday morning errands, a bit earlier than usual and without the kids, and came home to finish getting ready to leave for a weekend trip to see the BFF and family. Given that it is 2pm and I am online, you can guess that isn't how things worked out. I did my part, stayed up until 2am and got up at 6:30am to finish my work (my fault I was off schedule and it wasn't done) and then off to the bank, quick trip to grab a few things for the weekend visit and that is what I did. Before I left, I woke up the hubby, said can you please get up (9am now) and tend to the kids and start getting ready to go so I can get out of here now and back home faster. He agreed. I go about my business, knowing that I need this weekend away from home so bad that I can barely contain myself at the thought of hitting the road. Kids were even excited, well the 3 year old was. Called home 3 times to say I was at this point in my list, do I need anything else; again to say I decided to just hit Publix and whatever else we need we will get there as I was told there are both Target and Wal Mart nearby; third call to say turn on the oven, I am en route with brunch (pizza as requested) and we can get loading up while it cooks. I get home......not one single thing has been done. Well, the 14 mo old had breakfast. No bags packed, nothing cleaned up. Nothing. I left a very specific list for each child's needs to be packed, brought in from the shed the things that we needed to take -included them on the lists - and put suitcases in our bedroom to be packed for us. Didn't leave a list for his suitcase, he is old enough to know how and what he needs to pack. Not ONE item. Left a final 'to-do' list showing bathroom needs cleaning, empty trash, scoop cat boxes, etc and not one thing was done from that list either. I figured surely he at least packed his own bag. I was wrong.
I decided that if the acceptable way to do things is to sit on my ass and let them be done for me then by God that is what I am going to start doing. I can't take this level of stress where I have to do/think/act and plan for every simple task for the entire family so I am just going to sit on my ass, like he does, and see what happens. We may get overtaken by dirty laundry and no one will likely eat a decent meal. I am not paying the bills, doing the budget - none of it. I will make sure the kids are taken care of, not to worry, but they are where I draw the line. If it is okay to be so damned inconsiderate of everyone else in the house, that's what I will do. I would prefer to have a clean, well run house with responsibilities taken and shared but I am so worn out from being the only one to do so. That's it. I'm done.....
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4 comments:
Oh....at least pay the light bill and cable bill so you can watch tv while you sit on your ass :0 !!
I understand COMPLETELY!!
I understand so much that I would not even have bothered to make the list to leave with anyone in the house...well with the exception of my wonderful 16 year old daughter who is compulsively obsessive like her mommy...because no one but she and I care what gets done in the house.
Did you at least get to get away for your weekend??
Nope. Stayed home and worked like mad all weekend so maybe during the week I can have more time free of something to do every single minute!
Michelle, seriously, are we married to the same man? Or at least...twins separated at birth? Coz my hubby is the exact same way. He will live in filth and squallor, as long as there's food in the fridge, a cigar to smoke, and the TV remote ain't broke. And he's the SAHD! I told him he should write a book, "How to Raise Three Small Children Without Ever Leaving the Comfort of Your La-Z-Boy Recliner." Lazy being the operative word.
And here's the rub: If I leave lists and give him reminders, I'm a nag. If I don't, "well, you didn't remind/ask/tell me"! Well, no one has to tell me to 1) get up and fix breakfast; pack lunches, prep dinner; 2) go to work; 3) pay the bills and manage money; 4) feed animals; 5) do laundry; 6) empty dishwasher; 7) take out trash; 8) go to grocery store, etc., etc., etc. No one hands me a list either, I just---TA DA---look around, see what needs to be done, and guess what? I DO IT!
Yeah, I think there needs to be a support group...coz I don't know what to do either. If I do nothing, we live like pigs...if I do everything, then I'm tired, resentful, and even then, I'm accused of being a martyr who can't relax and enjoy life. So I don't know...let me know how your experiment works...I may try it again myself!
It only lasted until Tuesday. I couldn't take the mountain of (clean) laundry in the basket on top of the dryer waiting to be folded; the unswept floors and less than clean rugs; the dirty dishes (well rinsed by me) stacked on the counter directly above the (by me) emptied dishwasher; the stack of recycling to be taken out - it was too much! Oh well, guess I wasn't cut out to be a scientist, my experiment failed!
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